Drugged dummy

There's a funny thing that my body does. I'm not really sure why or what the chemistry of it all means, but for whatever reason drugs stay in my system for a loooooooooong time. I've always been a one Benedryl only in an emergency kind of a gal because if I take any more than that, I'm liable to be stuck to my bed the next morning unable to function. I've had a sinus infection for a couple weeks now, and last night I did the forbidden. I took night time cold medicine.

I slept great, and I even woke up on time. That's where the trouble began. I stumbled into the shower feeling a little groggy, and couldn't figure out why the shower was so cold. I kept turning the cold down, down, down, until I finally concluded that Jon must have taken an hour long shower before me and used up the entire water heater tank. It's 25 degrees out, and I'm pretty sure my water was not much warmer. I scrambled through it ready to chew Jon out for his extravagance, when I realized my drug induced folly. Instead of turning the cold down, I had turned it all the way up to full blast. Oops.

Must have been a fluke right? Wrong. It didn't stop there. I went to pick up my niece for Mom's Day Out and spent a good 5 minutes frantically running through the house looking for her lunch box which I had "just had in my hands and must have set down somewhere" before looking down and realizing I still had it in my hands. It was at that point that Raegan, my sister, decided that she better do the driving for our Mom's Day Out excursions.

She drove, and we were all good until we got to the mall. I opened the door to get Max and exclaimed, "RAEGAN! You didn't have his carseat seatbelted into the CAR!"
"Um, Retta, his seat is snapped into the car seat base [you total moron]."

And the real kicker. We're sitting at lunch in the food court, and I peek into Raegan's Gymboree bag and notice that she picked up gift boxes for the Christmas pj's we purchased for all the kids. "Oh, what a good idea! You got gift boxes. Why didn't I think of that?"
"Retta, don't you remember we had a conversation about the gift boxes in the store? The lady asked us if we wanted them."
"Nooo. She must have just asked you because I didn't hear any of that."
We run into Gymboree on the way out for my coveted gift boxes. I peek into Raegan's bag to see her gift boxes, only to realize it is actually MY bag and MY gift boxes.

From now on, I'm layin' off the cold meds.